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| Blogs > thickblackstic > Communication is a balance |
You Can’t Beat the ‘Gag Reflex Excuse’
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You Can’t Beat the ‘Gag Reflex Excuse’ Ever wonder if some of the stuff you think you know about sex might not be true? Sex myths start for all sorts of reasons, and are usually buried in misinformation stemming from being uncomfortable with certain topics revolving around what goes on (or doesn’t!) in the bedroom. Debunking those myths can broaden your range of sexual experience, and open the door to new adventures. All it takes is a little honest and open discussion with your partner to work through the hype and find out that nearly all things are possible! The following four sex myths are prime for debunking: Sex Myth # 1: You Can’t Beat the ‘Gag Reflex Excuse’ Being well<b> endowed </font></b>is always good for bragging rights - but not always so great if you like receiving oral sex! Many women eye large equipment with a wary eye, and plead a gag reflex when the idea is broached. Most guys give up at this point, and either do without or find another partner. Fortunately, the ‘gag reflex excuse’ CAN be beaten! Reassure her. She probably doesn’t have an aversion to the actual act of giving oral sex - she’s just scared you may try to cram it down her throat and she’ll throw up on you. (SO not sexy!) Lie back, grab the headboard and solemnly promise not to grab her head and force her down on you. Be patient and let her experiment - she doesn’t have to completely swallow you for it to be fun! Offer motivation. If she’s still leary to go down on you, offer to do her first. Turn about is fair play! The sixty-nine position with her on top gives her control, and lets both of you have some fun. Try it together! If you’re really self confident in your manhood, buy a couple of sex toys and hold a contest with her to see who can deep throat the most inches. When the situation is casual instead of tense and loaded with anxiety, it’s a lot easier to relax and just go with the flow. Once she figures out that she probably won’t puke all over you, she’ll be much more inclined to give the real thing a go. Sex Myth # 2: Women Don’t Want a One Night Stand Oh, please. Women today have evolved wayyyy past the “I need a man to protect and provide for me” stage. We have jobs and careers just like you… and sometimes the effort of starting a ‘relationship’ is just too much effort. We dream of meeting a guy who will spring for a nice hotel room, give us exactly what we want, cuddle for fifteen minutes and then leave so we can sleep in. One small problem. Guys who do that are studs, but women are sluts - or so we’ve had hammered into our heads since birth. We still want to think of ourselves as ‘nice girls’, so let us have our illusions, OK? We want to pretend to ourselves that it’s a night of passionate romance while it lasts, so don’t tarnish it with dirty talk - we’re not whores just because we want to get off without commitment. Sex Myth # 3: Anal Play is a No-No Oh really? Nerve endings are nerve endings, and anything down there can trigger a lot of excitement - for both of you! Drop the idea that women who like anal play are nasty, or that men who like it are secretly gay. Guys, you’ll find your partner is a lot more likely to open up to the idea if you don’t make it a one way street. Admitting you like a little back door stimulation is more likely to turn her on than off, and if you let her experiment on you, she’ll probably let you play doctor with her, too. Don’t miss out on heightened pleasure and fun because of ridiculous hang-ups or ‘taboos’. As long as you trust each other, you shouldn’t be afraid to try anything at least once! Sex Myth # 4: Guys Don’t Fake This is probably one of the most prevalent myths - that men can’t fake it. A study conducted among college age men and women revealed the shocking fact that while 50% of women admit to faking orgasm at some point, 25% of men admitted to doing the same thing! When asked why they felt they needed to fake, men listed three main reasons: Sex was taking too long and they wanted it to end without ‘hurting her feelings’ Orgasm was unlikely (in many cases due to medication they were taking) They ‘missed their moment’ while trying to hold on until the woman climaxed A man wearing a condom can fake just as effectively as a woman. The real question is should ‘faking it’ be necessary at all? Most sex therapists agree that honesty is the best policy - and sex without orgasm isn’t pointless. Once you and your partner agree that a climax is icing on the cake of a good time, you can both relax and enjoy yourselves. When the ‘pressure to perform’ is off, orgasm often comes naturally!  |
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