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Accepting Gifts
Accepting Gifts I have been seeing someone for almost two years. It is not a serious, committed, monogamous relationship. How often we get together varies....could be every other week, but then also a month can go by before we get together again. We enjoy a lot of the same things... we are both foodies, like to travel, movies, etc. We are good friends who happen to also have sex. Not a great romance, but a very nice relationship. A great example of FWBs that actually works. He travels a lot on business and often buys me gifts, mainly jewelry. I am appreciative, but I don't wear jewelry very often and already have a few favorite items that I have collected over the years, some with sentimental value. I feel a little guilty that I seldom wear what he buys me. I have said numerous times, please don't get me anything else, but he says he likes getting me things. BTW money is not an issue for him. So I accept graciously. I never buy him anything, he buys himself anything he can possible want. And I'm struggling financially. Which is another issue for me. Not that I would ever accept money to help pay my bills, but when he gives me something or takes me out to a dinner that would pay off some of my debts I can't help but think of the pointless extravagance. (Not that it stops me from enjoying a nice night out ) I know others have way worse dilemmas than this. OMG, I have way worse dilemmas than this! But as the holiday and gift giving season is upon us, it's something I can't help but think about. |
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There are things you can do for him that cost little or no money, such as making a nice meal, giving a thoughtful card, or wearing his gifts on special dates or occasions. Paying for both of you to have a nice meal or make a romantic trip is his way of doing something he wants to do, with someone he wants to be with, even though she cannot afford to pay her own way. If you can accept that and be a good companion, you are giving him something he will want and appreciate.
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I would accept as others have indicated and if the relationship is such that you communicate well suggest that he get you flowers or lingerie or something that is dearer to you.
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The gift giving season is always one fraught with landmines. The best way to approach it (in my mind anyway) is to give and do and help with what makes the recipient feel good about themselves. When receiving a gift, smile and say "thank you".
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I know where you're coming from, it's difficult to be in a position to receive gifts of a far greater value than what you can reciprocate with. Everyone says it doesn't matter, but it does matter when you're the one on the lean end of the gift pool.
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I'd be buying you sexy bras.. You would make them look amazing and it would be such a turn on for me to see you wearing something I bought for you with such thought and lust to see you wear it.. I would also if I had his means from time to time just have a quiet night with you and help you around the house. maybe help you avoid a repair mans bill.
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