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Who Initiates Contact - Men or Women?
Who Initiates Contact - Men or Women? It seems that all too often women, myself included, seldom make the initial email (or IM) contact. I'm not sure why. Is it some engrained double standard that men should make the first move? Fear of rejection? Fear of disappointment that the profile reads better than the real thing? When making the first move, especially here, a sexually oriented site, does it make a woman seem like a, for lack of better word ,"slut"? Given the "get laid tonight" message on A F F , will a man assume since she's contacting him that she wants to have sex with him? Women complain they get emails from too many men who don't meet their stated criteria. Maybe they would do better if they emailed the men that appealed to them, instead of waiting for Mr Right to email first. Looking back on the more successful relationships I've had from here, I have often contacted men whose blog intrigued me, amused me in a chatroom or profile caught my eye. Curious to know what others think about this topic. |
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5/19/2018 5:24 pm |
I think it is genetic, biological, how our brains are wired. Men initiate, women choose from whom approach them.
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I have no issue with whomever initiates contact. I think the ladies receive such a large amount of unsolicited uncouth (to put it mildly) emails that one would think why potentially invite more.
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A few days ago I was thinking about this imbalance of power, and how it may affect the way people communicate. Tt would be nice to be the one to initiate contact. Not because I am a 'seeker' or in any way assertive. Simply for the sake of equality and good karma. The fact is that there is no time or opportunity to do so, as a female user here. The moment I signed up and activated my profile there were too many incoming messages to sort through.
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In all the years I've been in here, only once did a woman initiate contact. I'm very grateful she did.
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Here, as in real life, if men don't ask then they don't get.... and women choose from the men who ask. It is ridiculous that (some) women complain about the emails they receive. All they have to do is take down the photos of their tits, look at men's profiles and email the ones that interest them. It's like the complaint about cock shots - switch on the filter and never be bothered by them again! Simple solutions
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I often initiate contact and rarely get a response. I send many well thought out messages per month without receiving any responses. I only send emails to women with profiles that truly interest me. It would be nice if more women would reach out to me to let me know that they are interested in me. With that being said, I do agree with what Sweettexgal posted. If a woman hot lists me or even views my profile I will sometimes treat that as initiating contact. KC
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I see no problem with the woman initiating contact. I do so all the time, for various reasons.
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3/7/2015 4:09 pm |
Rather have the woman make a move if she interested. I'm sure most women on this site get bombarded every time they are on.
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I don't see a problem with women making the first move. It doesn't make her a slut.
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Given the ratio of men to women there really isn't much need for a woman to initiate contact. When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
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Well, I'm a guy and I've been making the first contact. Too many times, I think I am contacting someone, but it's most likely a fake profile. Too many of those here (and on other sites).
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