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| Blogs > rm_Quixy101 > Gravity |
Random Thoughts
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Random Thoughts My head is full of "stuff" today... Do you ever have one of those days when there is lots going on inside and outside of your head that you're really not sure if you're all there? Well I feel like that right now. I have a bunch of stuff to do...a big project coming to a close and then a bunch of new things starting. I feel a bit twilight zonish...somewhere between here and there... Yesterday I committed an act of random kindness...it was purely unselfish and nice. I was rewarded with a very heartfelt thank you and it made me feel good. Today I did another one...the response was a bit over whelming...I mean when you do something nice for a person and she breaks down and cries, well that's great but it's kinda overwhelming...sigh. I was telling someone else about these two things and the comment that came back was - well! Guess you'll be well taken care of for the next little while... You know, I never even thought of payback. Never did it in the first place to get payback and never expected anything other than a thank you...but while we're on the subject...lol...payback would be soooo nice...Oh that makes me feel so guilty to say that.I really didn't do either thing to<b> illicit </font></b>returns. And now if I get some kind of reward I'll feel guilty. Actually I already said to one of the people that I'd really like to go out for dinner or something together...so that would be excellent payback, don't expect anything more cause she's in a very exclusive relationship...the other one, well we already have been intimate several times and it would be nice to be again, but I also don't want her to think that's why I did it. So I'm torn...I guess what I'll do is wait and see...if either offers then it's their choice right? I mean I didn't ask for anything, so if I don't get anything then I won't worry about it and if they offer I mean I'd be crazy not to say yes... That's quite the quandry isn't it...Not sure I can set that one straight in my mind... Then there's work...crazy day today and tonite and tomorrow. Then full contact golf this weekend. What you may ask is "full contact golf"? Well it's a system golf tournament where 90% of my will be in attendance. I'm there as a guest of one of my current , but will likely be bombarded with inquiries. So it will in essence be full contact, in that they will want to talk to me, especially seeingas the project I am just about to complete has an impact on all of the rest of them...so I'd better be sharp this weekend....sigh. Relationships this month have been very puzzling. I have met a couple of wonderful new people who have confused the hell out of me...it appears now neither of them is interested in me anymore which mystifies me because all I did was follow their lead. Guess I misread their signals, which of course confuses me even more. Sigh... Then a couple of my older relationships have shown signs of new life...so now I am in all sorts of conversations...and stuff...See there's that word again. Add to all of this a very dear friend had major surgery about three weeks ago. She is recovering, but slowly and here I am 1000 miles away with no way of helping other than the occassional email, etc. So that's in there too. Plus ( I know it never ends!!) it's time to book the family vacation...sigh...prices have skyrocketed and it just makes me feel nervous. But I booked some hotels today, so that at least is a load off my mind. The scary thing is it'll be here before I know it...Yikes. And then I have a big trip next weekend...a bit nervous about that too...never been there before, and don't know what to expect. But I am optimistic that it will be fun and exciting...time will tell. The company sures looks good, so here's hoping... So you think that's enough stuff? Well add to all that that my has decided that his career needs a change (he's like 25)...so I have been talking to him about that. A Career change at 25??? My goodness, my first career change happened at 40 cause the company failed! That was like 20 years into my career, not 3!! But today's youth are not as patient as I was or others I grew up with...sigh. So yes...my head is full...and spinning...I have Friday off, so I think maybe I'll just relax and take life as it comes that day...I think I need/deserve it. Ok...the update is done. Thanks for playing...lol |
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5/28/2008 4:13 pm |
well my dear - i have performed many random acts of kindnesses ~ paid for coffee for the car behind me in the timmies drive through, paid bills for people, brought flowers for someone I knew was down, taken a kid or two for an exasperated mom etc - its what I do. Sadly, as a recipient, I have had the same returned very rarely. But thats just it ~ it makes ME feel wonderful to makes someone's world a btter place, even if its just me doing their dishes cause they had no time. Needless to say, yesterday, I was quite stunned kwim? it was something I had NEVER considered. At least i wasnt bawling, like I was LAST wk, when someone surprised me. It took me 10 min to get control of myself...and I am sure the poor guy wasnt too impressed. I guess my point is ~ sometimes its nice when someone reaches out, and accepting knowing there are no strings. Especially when u are a single parent, who has always been shit on, and who gives and gives and gives, and everyone takes, but no one ever refills. Its nice when people are genuinely kind. Hope your week gets better.
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OH my gosh. LOL you do have a plate full. Hope it all works out the way you want and deserve.
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Very Twilight Zone! You need an afternoon of some lovin!!
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5/28/2008 11:35 am |
Stop the merry-go-round I wanna get off Share my journey...I write when my soul cries.
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