Hookup, Find Sex or Meet Someone Hot Now
Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
Hookup, Find Sex or Meet Someone Hot Now
| Blogs > peekabooicu2ucme > Musings and mayhem of my mind |
The illusion of control and a certain future
|
The illusion of control and a certain future I've had a lot of stress these past couple of months and it's taking its toll on my humor and mood. Even small frustrations have hit me like a shovel full of shit to the face. While I've tried to not snap at the midgets or Pater Familias, I know that my aura of stressing depression is evident nonetheless. I did a lot of introspection around 3am when I was wide awake and feeling a touch weepy. What I came to realize about myself and why everything has been sticking to me lately instead of rolling off, is that I like to feel like I'm in control and being able to see a happy future. Then I realized that it's all bull shit.  No one can control everything. There will always be other people to come along and fuck up what you have planned so meticulously. The future you see for yourself can be destroyed by someone else in an instant. There is nothing certain. Just gotta flow with it and try to paddle the best we can. Not to say that there's nothing anyone can do and might as well give up now. There are always things one can do to make the shit storms more bearable. Many pitfalls and traps can be avoided, just not all of them. This is where I envy people with faith a little bit. I haven't believed in anything since I was about 5 or so. I see some people comfort themselves with prayer or the hope/wish that everything will be alright if only they believe hard enough. Or that they can "put it all into God's hands" because He will make it alright. While I wish I could believe that, I've just never been able to. I hold out the thought that God could be real, but he sure isn't holding hands and solving issues the way people are praying for. It's like when there's a war going on, both sides are praying to win, someone's gonna be disappointed.  Anywho, so looking for my human solutions, I realize that I can only do the best that I can do, hope that it all works out to the best that it can, and deal with it if it doesn't. It's easier said than done, but stressing about it all surely isn't helping anyone. The future is not written, we write it every day. I'm going to try to write a good day today.   |
|||
|
They say God works in mysterious ways. I'm not really a believer, although I came close when a nurse prayed for me when I was in an intensive care ward. Maybe I SHOULD have more faith?
| ||
|
Probably...what? I can't get my wisdom from a classic movie?  Yeah, I know, they suck. And I'm glad ya'll are here to hear me vent. Just the act of blowing off a little steam is pretty therapeutic. 
| ||
|
I do, or at least I try to. Sometimes it's easy to get a little off track when the shit storm blows hard though. Thanks, I love to write in it, and to get feedback. 
| ||
|
They say God works in mysterious ways. I'm not really a believer, although I came close when a nurse prayed for me when I was in an intensive care ward. Maybe I SHOULD have more faith?
| ||
|
I do hang in there, and all the support I get helps.
| ||
|
Ya know Peeks? I totally feel ya on this post All are welcome to an audience with The Magnificent One oldirtybacchus
| ||
|
Ya know Peeks? I totally feel ya on this post
|
Become a member to create a blog
