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Blogs > passionately68 > My Blog

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger...not true  

passionately68 82F
576 posts
2/21/2016 12:44 pm

Last Read:
3/2/2016 11:37 am
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger...not true

It's now 2009 and I am about to get the shock of my life. I only had my Social Security and enough to pay the morgage, electricity and food. I knew Steve was under great stress also and I was a basket case. He continued to call me 10-15 time a day to try to cheer me up. I tried my hardest to be upbeat when he came home from work. I knew he was out looking for a jobs some days. One night he made wild and passionate love to my almost like the first night we meant. He told me I was the woman of his dreams and goregous and all the things he always said to me. When I woke up the next morning I was happy and fortified.
The morning passed quickly and I did a load of wash and dried it and put it away, when I realized I hadn't received a call. I called the shop and Kim answered. I asked to speak to Steve but Kim said he hadn't arrived yet? I told Kim he was probably out trying to find another job. Then I called Steve but he didn't answer. I left him a message to contact me. That went on all afternoon. I kept checking with Kim but he hadn't heard from him either. By dinner time I was getting worried. I thought maybe he had an accident. I kept calling him but he never called back. I started calling local hospitals but he wasn't in any of them. I was frantic by this time. It was about 9pm when I called him in tears and told him I was checking with hospitals and was calling police departments.
About 1/2 later he called. I screamed into the phone and asked him where he was and his replys was "dont call hospital babe..........I am not coming home" and I said "tonight?" and I heard him crying and he said " never " and hung up. I think I stopped breathing for a couple of minutes. I could think, my mind was stuck on his last words. I tried calling him back but he didn't answer. I tried all night to get him too. I was hysterical. He was gone and I didn't have anyone to turn too.
Believe me, things just got worse but I made it though this segment without breaking down.

charmander690 56M
8 posts
2/21/2016 12:57 pm

 You're a very strong woman.


passionately68 replies on 2/22/2016 9:12 am:
Thank you dear but as you will read, it took a long time to regain my strength.
xx
Judy

rickyspanish76 48M
7843 posts
2/21/2016 1:16 pm

 Have pride of yourselfe...
Woman of Arms....


passionately68 replies on 2/22/2016 9:14 am:
Thank you for your nice message. If you keep reading you will know I am not worthy of your feelings. It took me much longer to recover.
Judy{=}

love2pleasu13 56M
Ask me for a photo
6472 posts
2/21/2016 1:29 pm

 wild as hell


passionately68 replies on 2/22/2016 9:15 am:
Not exactly sure of what that means. I don't consider myself to be wild but maybe you are just saying "it's a wild ride"?
Thank you for posting to me though,
Judy

s2ndegree 65M
9800 posts
2/21/2016 2:43 pm

 It's a sad story to be sure.Woman will always persevere.Where there was one
there are many more waiting in the wings.
When a living person is unworthy solely by assumptions and age. Is a sad testament to how far we've come.While I am touched by your story I
find it even harder to be moved!
Using more than all the road!


passionately68 replies on 2/22/2016 9:19 am:
I do understand what you are saying. In the end I did preserve but at my age, it took much longer than it didn't when my family all passed in 2001. Thank you for your message though and I love that quote. Please read on, or go back and read up to this.
xoxo
Judy

sphxdiver 74M
21063 posts
2/21/2016 4:06 pm

 Just be glad you didn't have the IRS breathing down your back, those people never give up.


passionately68 replies on 2/22/2016 9:21 am:
Oh I did honey. In fact they dinged my Social Security for 350 a month and just two month's ago it was paid off. I think it was paid off much earlier but they probably added interest that I didn't know about. Keep reading and you will see all I had to deal with.
xx
Judy

Owatalife 67M
1711 posts
2/21/2016 4:27 pm

 The unexpected in life is the most difficult to deal with, nothing
that causes one pain whether physical of emotional will make
you stronger. Only more bitter and hardened towards most
things around you. Most folks don't ever get over severe bumps
in the road Judy, while others seem to have the backbone to
overcome all those obstacles. {=}


passionately68 replies on 2/22/2016 9:28 am:
Good morning from California honey. I did answer your beautiful message to me this morning. So you have a little better view of where this is going. It almost broke my back.
I love you my friend,
Judy

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