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| Blogs > oneladybrijit > For What It's Worth! |
Failure!
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Failure! Tonight was funny, only I didn't see it that way, as for once I proved beyond reasonable doubt that I am very human. I have always had this air of confidence that I can do anything. Tonight I proved that might now always be the case, as by the end of the evening, I threw out what I had prepared earlier, just like in my young days! I have been cooking these what I consider fantastic and really simple "ricotta and spinach filo rolls" for some weeks now. I do love them, cheese for calcium and protein, and they don't taste like they have too much fat, although how they couldn't is beyond me. I do mean the ones you buy frozen, and ready to just put in the oven. Ok, so I watch them prepare filo pastry on TV, and see they are all stressed, only they are on a tight time schedule, and I can take my time if I want to. Last night, I not only looked up filo pastry. I also looked up crumpets and croissants, partly for comparison, and much more because I just wanted to know how to make them. By today, I had lots of information, and it all should have been a breeze. Well the preparation was. It took almost nothing to prepare the pastry. Then I set it aside to rest. Even when I forgot about it for about three hours, it seemed quite forgiving, and I figured that was because it was properly covered, and the moisture had been retained. Then I sort of got stuck, so I decided to ring Mum, only her answering machine took my call. Then I thought ok, try one of my sisters, and for a change, I chose my baby sister. Oops, she had no idea, and not because of her age, because she has more than the woman in the shoe, and she doesn't mess around making pastry, has better things to do with her time. Ok, I deserved that. The short version is that my kitchen is now cleaned up and the filo spinach and cheese rolls were the most amazing failure I have ever seen! What a sight! Wow! I can cook! Only tonight I would have won the amateurs miserable failure award. It's easy to go, ok, too complicated. No, not really. I just didn't have my mind on the job. I was not together enough to focus on what I was doing. When I rang my sister, I was trying to work on these rolls, and set up a concoction of the spinach and cheese mix in a mini blender. Then I sat down and kept chatting. At the end of the phone call, I really wasn't concentrating enough on what I was doing, and made a huge amount of mix, and then put the lot on a tiny amount of pastry. The pastry was overloaded, so it did what you'd expect. It broke, not in one place, all over the place, and then I sort of did careless damage control, because I just wasn't focussing on the job, made a touch more pastry, and just threw it over the rest, and then when it failed too, I just looked at it all stupid. Then Mum rang back, and by the end of the phone call, I was going to make pancakes, and just put all the mix in them, like cheese pancakes, or banana fritters, and yes, I have done both before. It could have saved the potential loss of food, only! Then I just tired out, so off I went, had a sleep, and meanwhile the mix sat on the bench. By the time I woke up, I knew it would be off by now, so there really was no point. Umm, so it had to get flushed! Ok, so I am not perfect, only try telling me that! I just don't understand that it's ok to make a mistake, and this one is quite funny, because I just set myself up for failure all the way from when I stopped thinking for myself. All I had to do, was stay with what I was doing, stop trying to get help, and just think for myself. Umm, actually, I am not sure how I would have handled things, as I think I just blew the whole thing. Ok, at the make the mix to go on the pastry stage, I only had a small quantity of pastry. I could have put most of the mix in the fridge, while I made a few pastries to start with, with the pastry I already had, and then if I liked the outcomes, I could have used the rest of the mix. Yeah, ok, so I was a total dill this evening, and now at midnight, I have finally cleaned up the mess, and am quickly baking some "instant dinner". Hmmmm!  I mean how stupid can you be, to not even notice that you are really stuffing it all up! That's me all over, if I make a mistake, it always has to be so big that everyone knows about it. Luckily, I don't often make mistakes, just when I do, they are always beauties. OK, I want some dinner really soon, so I am going to microwave some veggies, so it's at least a bit healthy! That's better, they are on too now. Boring, crummy fish and chips, oven cooked, with nice micro veggies. Now if I get the tartare sauce, NO! smacked hand, no tartare! fat enough! Ok, I won't. Yummy! Umm, looks like the tartare is coming out! makes a boring dinner yummy! It's not that bad anyway, as I eat that much healthy food, that a bit of wicked won't hurt at all. So now you have discovered that wow, when she makes a mistake, it can be both quite funny, and quite a little beauty!  Hope your day/night is more positively eventful! Yum, dinner!
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